love’s firm grasp

I was able to spend a significant amount of time with my parents, my sister, and her two young boys recently. On our way out of town back toward the airport to fly back to Seattle, my sister, her boys, and I stopped by the historic part of town, parallel parked, and walked around for a bit. As we got back to the car, her oldest started to walk around the street side of the car where his seat was located. I grabbed him just in time and spun him around. “I told you to wait!!! It’s dangerous out there on that side,” I told him. “I was just going to my seat!” he said, noticeably upset that he had been scolded by me… and his mother who had also told him to wait. “You may not have even made it there!”

After it was all over we started to be pals again. As we drove through the desert I started thinking about how foolishly I act without even knowing it. I am ready to go a certain way and do a certain thing without any regards for the danger around me. I am in such a rush with a single track mind, just wanting to get to my seat, to my life, to my purpose… to my future. I am spun around so quick with an, “I told you to wait!!” from my Father. I get noticeably upset, unable to comprehend the danger I would have stepped into.

After my tears dry He speaks again, “I get after you because I love you and I want the best for you.” I smile at him and know that He’s right. “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.”

The Essence of Unseen

Sitting in front of an empty screen is consoling; the small blinking cursor in the sea of white reminds me of my current condition and the state of my emotions. After traveling for the last 10 months experiencing a myriad of situations, worldviews, and thought processes, my mind and spirit have been on a proverbial rollercoaster. It was a ride that I thoroughly enjoyed.

Upon arriving back in the US, my expectations were sent soaring. The Not Alone Benefit made some money for the Mercy Development Home in Ethiopia, I saw some friends and family members, and then all of the sudden I was on my way back to Kona to resume studies and work on the publication from our experiences. What I didn’t anticipate was the slight depression that landed on me almost simultaneously with my plane landing in Honolulu. Depression is something that I have struggled with in the past, almost as if whenever I look behind me it is as if a shadow is always a hundred feet behind…sometimes closer, sometimes further, and sometimes I don’t even look.

Over the last few days, I think that I have been able to identify areas in my life that the depression feeds off of. I want to deeply trust God that He is who He says He is. I should know both in my head and my heart that He is good having witnessed His amazing provision and love. There is also this seemingly inherent fear of being hurt alone, as well as some psychological and emotional wounds in need of deep tissue healing. All of that culminating with the financial stresses of going through school with hardly any of the money than is required.

Maybe it has something to do with my struggle to always see God as my Father. In a recent talk to the body of believers out here in Kona, Andy Byrd, an amazing man of God, gave a parallel of his relationship with His son. Asher is about 4 years old and is passionate about his love for his father. He never distrusts Andy’s ability to clothe, feed, and give good gifts to him. Andy is not God, but the reliance that Asher has on his daddy is the way I want to relate with my Heavenly Father. In fact, that is the way that faith is supposed to work. With my eyes fixed on God, the waves around me are insignificant next to the power that He has. And then there is the promise that God’s power, the power that raised Christ from the dead, is living inside of me. Why do I worry? Why do I strive for control over my life when the Perfect Father, the Creator and Sustainer of the universe is alive within me? The reality of Jesus and His life is the reality that I need to be living in, not this façade, this thin, filthy veneer that I see. It about looking beyond, looking to the reality that Christ brought – the Kingdom that He ushers in – the Kingdom that He placed within.

As I have mentioned in some of my posts, I love the thought of Love. The word has lost a lot of meaning in our time and can mean anything from a red glass window in Amsterdam paid for by the hour, to the subculture of the 70’s, to the ultimate sacrifice of Jesus Christ. The love I speak about is the unending love, the love that gives expecting nothing in return, the love that costs something, unselfish. This is the type of love that God has for the world, the type of love that I have seen the world in desperation for. What I haven’t realized or taken to heart was that the passionate, unrelenting, undistracted, devastating, and unconditional love that the world is burning for is the same love that God has for me; that He has for you. He is mesmerized by one glance from my eyes; His heart blazes at one trifling word of affection from our hearts to His. I have to know that love, I need to feel it not only for the world, but for myself. Oh, to wake up to the reality of the love of Christ – the destructive love of the relentless Lion and the tender embrace of the Lamb.

The program that I am enrolled in is expensive. It is even more expensive now that we are back in the States. The team of monthly supporters helps a great deal, but as it stands, I have no way of paying for the school fees as well as the bills that I have back home as well. I have this issue of pride with asking for others to come along-side me, joining me in accomplishing the goal and finishing the program, but after praying about what God wanted me to do, I felt that I should use the blog this week to do just that. It is a sacrifice of my pride, the idea that I should be providing for myself, and what I think the blog should be… but, in obedience, I have to.

I started PhotogenX last September and I intend to finish it. These next 6 months we will be working on a publication from our travels and experiences with injustice around the world. We want it to be a catalyst of change in the world. We are willing to be used, but we need help. I need help. My fees for the school are $4,000 just for this next 3 months and at the moment I don’t have it. I am trusting God for this provision believing that He can finish what He started. The waves of financial pressure are building all around me, but He knows exactly where I am and He is with me. If you would like to stand with me, there are many ways to do so; please let me know.

Thanks for reading about my journeys and experiences. I pray that you open yourself up to the Amazing Love and Grace that comes only through a loving relationship with Jesus Christ.

In Obedience to Him,

John Paul

the Holy Land

[Near Empty Streets in the Old City... Rare for daytime]

Driving through the south of Israel, I couldn’t believe that I was really here. It was incredible, so much history. Our hostile is located near the Damascus Gate of the Old City of Jerusalem and you can frequently find members of the team in getting photos and meeting up with new friends. Its such a different place. The feel of a new city with relatively empty, clean streets, McDonalds, and the Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf (a company I worked for in SB while enrolled at Westmont) meets another world of cramped minimarkets, crowded alleyways, lousy plumbing, and suspicious glances. After it snowed, there were even snowballs hurled from rooftops on the unsuspecting and suspecting alike. I really love it here. I try to imagine it they way Jesus walked it, but I can’t really, cities change and evolve, as did Jerusalem.
Tim, Naphtalie and I had a chance to head to Galilee for a couple of days in the Northern parts of Israel. It was incredibly green, lush with the new grain crops, rolling hills and peaceful valleys. We visited cities like Capernaum and Nazareth, and locations like the Sea of Galilee and the cliffs of Arbel. We even attended the Nazarene Church of Nazareth, which was a congregation made up of Christian Arabs; amazingly beautiful worship. I would love to come back someday.

For some reason, I thought that by my presence in Jerusalem, I would be able to make a stand for justice, find out all the issues of the Palestinian/Israeli conflict, and be able to tell you a specific formula for peace and change in the land… They were lofty expectations, I realize, and now I am crushed because I can’t. I guess the real reason that I am crushed is because that, left to human hands, there can be no peace here.

I had this thought that Israel was right… that the land belonged to them. After all, they need it to fulfill the covenant that God made to Abraham and Moses. But what about the other people that have lived here for hundreds of years before the massive influx of Jews from all over the world began in the early 1900’s? This question was heavy on my heart because it was so easy for me to align myself with God’s “chosen people”… until I started reading the Scriptures for myself and listening to people who are much smarter than me.

As I read, I discovered the whole of the Old Testament points to a very specific moment and a very specific person… Jesus Christ. God promised Abraham that from his descendants would come a Light to the nations; the sacrificial practice so that the people would recognize God’s perfect son, sacrificed for the iniquity of all, and the promised-land? the promised land is the Rule of God… the Kingdom of God. Paul alludes to this in Colossians 2:17 – “For these rules (the Law) are only shadows of the reality to come. And Christ Himself is that reality.” Throughout history, Israel has refused to obey God but He kept bringing them back to Himself in order to ensure that Jesus would be born exactly at the right time. That leveled the playing field, and now we all have the opportunity to be called sons of Abraham. Paul says that it isn’t bloodline that connects anyone to Abraham… it is their faith in God (Romans 9). Jesus gave Himself as the new covenant, that those who would believe and trust Him would be invited into the Promised Land (Matt 26:27-29;Lk 22:20)

As followers of Christ, we must take a neutral ground to the conflict in Israel. Jesus made it obvious (as did the rest of the Bible [Jews were to be the light to the nations]) that salvation is for all people. There are injustices being done on both sides by people who haven’t had a revelation of the love of Christ, and that, is our mission. We can feed the hungry, proclaim freedom for the captives, give a glass of water all in the name of Jesus and remain unaligned to either side. But, we must engage with them and love them because God created them and wants them to know Him in a personal way. CHRIST IS THE ONLY WAY for peace in this land.

I became completely frustrated that I didn’t have some say in the matter, that there was no explanation or method to bring these different nations to stop killing each other; to put down their weapons and embrace each other as brothers. Until all of them come to their knees and acknowledge that Christ is King, they will not. As a human, with all of my pride and arrogance, it was hard for me to accept… So what is my responsibility in the matter? I need to know God in a deeper way, so that I can help others to know Him and His love as well. Then, and only then, will these two religious and ethnic powerhouses come under the reign of the Prince of Peace. Israelis need Christ just as badly as Palestinians do. It is ultimately refreshing to see local Christians here, I have a deep respect for them in their efforts for peace and reconciliation. I hope that we can support our brothers and sisters in Christ and bring change to this world so rich in beauty and history.

Pictures faded in and our as I sat in horror in front of the computer monitor. Images of children barely alive, young men with the biggest scars I have ever seen from machete hacks, and young women who were the object of multiple rapes. I gasped that people could do that to each other. My heart has been broken for three consecutive days over the atrocities that are going on in the “Democratic Republic” of Congo. Since 1998, 5.4 Million people have died as a result of the civil war; the worst humanitarian crisis since the Holocaust… Have you heard about it? I hadn’t until this week.

This made me do some serious thinking. How could so many people be dying while I have just stood by so ignorantly? These are people that God created and that He loves. I even went through a crisis in my faith, whether I trusted God’s sovereignty in the midst of this situation. It seems like every time I find out something else is happening (and has been happening) in the world, I get more sad and depressed. I feel like Solomon when He wrote in Ecclesiastes, “The greater my wisdom, the greater my grief. To increase knowledge only increases sorrow.” (1:18). Have the eyes of God overlooked the suffering of the innocent; have His ears not heard their cries? Where can we find God in the midst of these miserable situations and circumstances?

I will never be able to control the injustices in this world. I will never be able to stop the flow of grief and pain. For who am I? My faith is weak; my trust lacking; my pride hindering. I am ignorant to the greatness of God; His sovereign ability to hear the groans of the anguish across the face of the earth. I want to trust that His grace really is sufficient. I want to trust that He is not deaf and blind to the captives, the hungry, sick, and oppressed; that He has plans to prosper them in the midst of the bleakest situations imaginable; and that even the darkest alleys and jungles cannot hide from the Light of Life.

Is it possible that Jesus was serious when He called us to follow Him? Is it possible that that He weeps for His creation? But is it possible that He wants to bring glory to Himself? Is it possible that He can’s wait until He can say, “Yes, the rescuers are My people; I have commissioned them for this work. The love that they show is My love – their words and My words – their heart is My heart.”? Is it possible that we are His hands and feet and that He desperately wants to work through us? He can still accomplish His will with the hands of those who don’t know Him, but we rob Him of glory when we are complacent and slow to act… oftentimes not acting at all. Is it possible that He wants to use you?

Please visit this website and look for the Crisis in Congo Photostory:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/3842331/

Some links to get involved

http://www.savethechildren.net/alliance/where_we_work/AE/mapCG.html

http://www.merlin.org.uk/Where-we-work/Democratic-Republic-of-Congo.aspx

I know that so many of you are involved in showing God’s love and telling people about Jesus. Thank you for your faithfulness and I pray that you will remain strong and diligent to the task at hand. May God continue to bless you.

In His love

John Paul

Mom and Dad, what words could I ever say to you to tell you what you mean to me. I love you guys so much; you are so special to me. I couldn’t imagine anyone who would love and support me like you do. You are truly a blessing from the Father.

[The Division between the different quarters of the Old City is remarkably defined]

[View from Arab Quarter to Jewish Quarter]

[In the Jewish Quarter]

[Young Israeli on guard... Thinking about his girlfriend in Tel Aviv]

[And it was]

[The Old City has tombs around half of its walls. Looking toward Mt of Olives]

[Arab Casket]

[Candles at the location some think Christ was imprisoned]

[Popular toys]

[Photo for an assignment. Taken at a bus-stop with 3 completely burned buses. This was the nicest looking one. The Israeli and Palestinian Youth have a choice to stand for Hope and Peace]

[Cliffs of Arbel looking over Magdal... read what happened at the cliffs 100 years after Christ died HERE]

[Some of the tools Jesus would have been familiar with, but He would have also been an expert in stonework]

[Minar]

[Tim and his new best friend... he really wanted to buy one]

[Naphtalie didn't really kiss Petunia (the lamb's name) and didn't want to buy one]

[Millstone for crushing olives at an olive press]

[Oil lamp and scroll]

[Woman at an Arab-Christian Nazarene Church in Nazareth... yes]

[Grain field in front of the disputed Golan Heights]

They say Peter’s house was here… all I could see were rocks with huge buildings built over them]

[At the Sea of Galilee. This is probably the area where Jesus appeared to his disciples and fed them fish and bread before ascending to heaven]

[It snowed in Jerusalem... we got hit with snowballs and so did unsuspecting women and children]

[One man's trash]

[One girl's treasure]

[Streets of the Old City]

"Mars Hill really Rocked…" Last update from Greece!

[One of the most amazing sunsets ever, Porto Rafti, Greece]

Thank you, Dan Shannon, one of our speakers this week, for that lovely quote. As part of our teaching this week, the entire class and our speakers took a trip to Athens to spend the day around the Acropolis area, including the Areopagus (Mars Hill). A couple of us had spent some time there before, but one of our speakers, David Hamilton, gave some stellar background information on the area and the lifestyle of Athens at that time.

[First Olympic Stadium, Athens, Greece]

It was the center of the world for the arts, education, and contemporary thought. The philosophers could gather around the monumental temples in the center of the city and toss around ideas of democracy, science, and life. We read Acts 17 where Paul walks in to the center of town and makes his voice and the Gospel that it carries known. They called him an idiot and threatened him with his life (Socrates had been put to death for introducing foreign gods). Even in the face of them, he spoke to them with the authority of the Holy Spirit. It was the first time the Gospel had been shared there, and he was all by himself

[Acropolis Panorama at Night, Athens, Greece]

To gaze on these amazing buildings and to have insight into their structure and intricacies, there is no wonder that people worshiped those whom the buildings were built for. At one time in the Parthenon (the largest, most prominent temple to the goddess Athena Parthenon), there was a giant statue made of pure gold, diamonds, pearls and other precious jewels. These people held their gods in such high esteem, but why? In polytheistic cultures, people live in fear of the gods. They fashion their lives around pleasing them and bribing them with elaborate sacrifices and practices. When bad things happen, a god is mad at them so further action needs to be taken. The gods were always trying to do bad to them. As David Hamilton so eloquently put it, “Religion was a minimizing of fear not an establishment of hope.” So Paul waltzes in and challenges them by saying that there is an Unknown God, and that is a God that cares deeply about them; enough to send his Son to them to be the last sacrifice. This was revolutionary for them, a God that cared? A God of Grace?

Now, there are many lessons that I took away from not only from the teaching, but my time walking around the Acropolis.

The first is that the idolatry of the Greek culture was immensely beautiful. These buildings brought out emotion and awe, and who they stood for brought awe as well. They were still false gods, but they were, and still are attractive. Even now, there are so many things that are attractive to us, pulling us, but aren’t things of God. We start to worship materialism and set up mere humans in the places of importance in our lives. That’s just the tip of the iceberg with all of the things we place in the high places of our lives… But, just as with the buildings in the Acropolis, the things of this world will come to ruin. No matter how fast we work, or how much we maintain, they will always be temporal, no matter how great the appear. We can use the illustration for idolatry and sin in our lives; it might look great for a time, but in the end, it all turns to dust.

The philosophers must have looked at Paul like he was crazy; pointing to the vast buildings just beside them as testimony of their god’s greatness. But the God that Paul shared with them on that day in Athens is the same God that is alive and well today, dwelling in the lives of his people. He truly does last forever and it has been proven time and time again throughout the history of the world. When our hearts and lives aren’t built on the foundation of Jesus Christ, they will crumble to dust.

The second lesson was just as valuable. Like I said before, the people lived in constant fear because there was no way to please the multitude of manic, compulsory, selfish, immoral, and illusory gods. Paul submits to them that there is a God who actually cares for them and will extend perfect grace to them, not by a manner of bribery, but acceptance and revelation. So many times, even as Christians, we come with this thought of God like the Greek pagans did… If I do this for you, God, will you be satisfied; can I go to heaven? We have this mental block that he doesn’t really want the best for us; that our plans are more effective than his; that our comfort is of utmost importance. We believe the lies of the enemy that God is angry with us and will never accept us with our imperfections…

Well, I felt like this is what God was telling me earlier this week, even before going to Athens…

Then the angel showed me myself standing before the angel of the Lord. The Accuser, Satan, was there at the angel’s right hand, making accusations against me. And the Lord said to Satan, “I, the Lord, reject your accusations, Satan. Yes, the Lord, who has chosen him, rebukes you. This man is like a burning stick that has been snatched from the fire.”

My clothing was filthy as I stood there before the angel. So the angel said to the others standing there, “Take off his filthy clothes.” And turning to me said, “See, I have taken your sins, and now I am giving you these fine new clothes.” [Zechariah 3:1-4]

God is not far off, distant, and angry. He desires to take us as we stand before Him, filthy and unrefined. He cannot wait to extend his grace to us, but it does cost us something. We have to tear down the idols that we have and embrace him as the only Lord of our lives.

Last year around this time in my DTS lecture phase, I finally was able to co
me to this point. I realized that I had built my life on idols and didn’t know God. Those idols came crashing down and I found myself standing before God, afraid, but as my only hope. My clothes were black with sin, charred and filled with the smell of smoke. Satan stood there bringing accusations of all kinds which I had believed for so long. The Creator of the universe silenced him by extending his grace to me and I found myself renewed and clean; now standing before my Father.

If this is similar to your story, I would love to talk about it further. Like I said and my life testifies, God wants us to be in communion with him as His children. And, I want to challenge you all to examine your own lives and see if there are things that, although they may seem beautiful, you have built to unworthy places in you life. We can see from the story of the Greek gods, that they won’t stand a chance.

That’s it for now, until Turkey, may the Lord bless you and keep you

In Him

John Paul

Recent Thoughts…

[Journal Entry: 8-18-07]

Is my goal really to change the world? To do that would be a task monumental and impossible. To change the world would be to change humanity, sin nature, and the very things that make up this flesh.

Rather, I would like to make an impact on the world, not by adding to it anything, but by taking away from it; adding to the Kingdom of Heaven. Living as Christ has modeled for me, moving in the Spirit that quickens my heart to action. It will challenge everything I think I know about God, Jesus, culture, His image, politics, religious theology, service, obedience, the Word (Bible), and the Spirit.

To open God’s word; the Kingdom Book and read it finally with open eyes and an open mind… No longer being impressed and molded to the world around me, but being sculpted to His way; being first and foremost, a citizen of the Kingdom of Heaven; Kingdom obsessed.

It is time to take action. I don’t want to wait! I want to run in the freedom that Christ brought on the cross. I want to live the way he intends and bask in the fulfillment that action brings. I want my allegiance to be to my King alone, moving in His spirit, walking in his ways.

I have heard it said that God is doing something new in this time; but I know that my God is the same through eternity. He has been doing this all along. It is me giving up control of my life to see him for who he truly is and my life as it should truly be.

Are you ready?

Matthew 28:18-19
Christ tells us…
“I have been given all authority in heaven and on earth…
There fore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Fother and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Teach these new disciples to obey all of the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”

In Him,
John Paul Vicory