Posts Tagged: God

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19
Dec 09

a little video for my church

My church asked me to talk about poverty a little bit to tie into a message  about how much money we spend at Christmas and what we spend our money. He asked us to think about how much we spend on people or how much people spend on us that is wasted because we don’t like the gift or whatever.

The sermon can be found online here : http://www.nsb.org/sermons/a-classic-christmas

Anyway, he asked me to put something together for the service, kind of like a voice from within Northshore (the church i go to). So, I asked Devin to help. We shot it all on a Nikon D300s, 50mm f/1.4 with a RØDE microphone with video lights in front of a huge seamless backdrop.

The song is Needles and Thread by Sleeping at Last.

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11
Oct 09

love’s firm grasp

I was able to spend a significant amount of time with my parents, my sister, and her two young boys recently. On our way out of town back toward the airport to fly back to Seattle, my sister, her boys, and I stopped by the historic part of town, parallel parked, and walked around for a bit. As we got back to the car, her oldest started to walk around the street side of the car where his seat was located. I grabbed him just in time and spun him around. “I told you to wait!!! It’s dangerous out there on that side,” I told him. “I was just going to my seat!” he said, noticeably upset that he had been scolded by me… and his mother who had also told him to wait. “You may not have even made it there!”

After it was all over we started to be pals again. As we drove through the desert I started thinking about how foolishly I act without even knowing it. I am ready to go a certain way and do a certain thing without any regards for the danger around me. I am in such a rush with a single track mind, just wanting to get to my seat, to my life, to my purpose… to my future. I am spun around so quick with an, “I told you to wait!!” from my Father. I get noticeably upset, unable to comprehend the danger I would have stepped into.

After my tears dry He speaks again, “I get after you because I love you and I want the best for you.” I smile at him and know that He’s right. “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.”

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14
Aug 08

The Battle Within

Conversation with some friends yielded the topic of striving – a word that isn’t used very much, but is loaded with connotations of insecurity, priorities, recognition, and success. Most of us have this intense desire, whether consciously or not, of being recognized. We thrive knowing that someone approves of us, so when we put our hands to work, we are flooded with anxiety, worry, and disappointment. Many Christians even get into ministry or different projects thinking that God may love us more if we do some amazing things for Him. The motivation of our heart moves from doing anything out of love for God and His creation to seeking approval from the people around us and even from God. This kind of mindset creates an invisible prison that prevents us from moving in the freedom of who we were created to be. When we fail, we either stop trying or attempt another goal for our redemption – feeding off of the disappointment that we have brought upon ourselves. We are immersed in this kind of behavior neglecting the true purpose that we are made to go after unhindered by expectations and limitations. We have this mindset that the end or what we have to show of our lives is the result… the end is the point. In reality, the path is where the beauty is found.

Masks have been created from my striving, projecting an image of myself that isn’t real or true. I have hardly anything together, yet I find myself making it look like I do. With my hands on this mask, I am unable to approach those around me with open hands and an open heart. The thing is – most people still have their hands on their masks as well. We all have these areas where we keep locked away afraid to show others who we really are, but it is better to keep in mind that we are all made of the same parts and experience similar circumstances. If I have learned on thing by spending over a year and a half overseas is that we are all human and deal with both suffering and joy it is what connects us all. Having this mindset helps in dealing with both the struggles and eases of life, especially when there are others around you saying, “I can see where you are and I am here for you.” It is not only refreshing, but it is the correct posture that we should have in relation to each other. It helps put an end to striving for the chartless end and enjoy the radiance of life – loving who we are – living the way we were meant to live.

Finding Peace, Joy, and Love in the journey is finding the treasure. I may not have everything together, but God does, and He is inviting me on this journey of discovery – learning, trying, failing, and recovering. It is a beautiful process. I want to encourage you to let go of your striving and open yourself up to enjoy God and enjoy those around you. Life is an amazing gift. We were created to live with and to live for each other. We don’t have to wait until we are good enough or sufficient enough… if we were to do so, we would never stop waiting.

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12
Jul 08

The Essence of Unseen

Sitting in front of an empty screen is consoling; the small blinking cursor in the sea of white reminds me of my current condition and the state of my emotions. After traveling for the last 10 months experiencing a myriad of situations, worldviews, and thought processes, my mind and spirit have been on a proverbial rollercoaster. It was a ride that I thoroughly enjoyed.

Upon arriving back in the US, my expectations were sent soaring. The Not Alone Benefit made some money for the Mercy Development Home in Ethiopia, I saw some friends and family members, and then all of the sudden I was on my way back to Kona to resume studies and work on the publication from our experiences. What I didn’t anticipate was the slight depression that landed on me almost simultaneously with my plane landing in Honolulu. Depression is something that I have struggled with in the past, almost as if whenever I look behind me it is as if a shadow is always a hundred feet behind…sometimes closer, sometimes further, and sometimes I don’t even look.

Over the last few days, I think that I have been able to identify areas in my life that the depression feeds off of. I want to deeply trust God that He is who He says He is. I should know both in my head and my heart that He is good having witnessed His amazing provision and love. There is also this seemingly inherent fear of being hurt alone, as well as some psychological and emotional wounds in need of deep tissue healing. All of that culminating with the financial stresses of going through school with hardly any of the money than is required.

Maybe it is my inability to see God as my Father. In a recent talk to the body of believers out here in Kona, Andy Byrd, an amazing man of God, gave a parallel of his relationship with His son. Asher is about 4 years old and is passionate about his love for his father. He never distrusts Andy’s ability to clothe, feed, and give good gifts to him. Andy is not God, but the reliance that Asher has on his daddy is the way I want to relate with my Heavenly Father. In fact, that is the way that faith is supposed to work. With my eyes fixed on God, the waves around me are insignificant next to the power that He has. And then there is the promise that God’s power, the power that raised Christ from the dead, is living inside of me. Why do I worry? Why do I strive for control over my life when the Perfect Father, the Creator and Sustainer of the universe is alive within me? The reality of Jesus and His life is the reality that I need to be living in, not this façade, this thin, filthy veneer that I see. It about looking beyond, looking to the reality that Christ brought – the Kingdom that He ushers in – the Kingdom that He placed within.

As I have mentioned in some of my posts, I love the thought of Love. The word has lost a lot of meaning in our time and can mean anything from a red glass window in Amsterdam paid for by the hour, to the subculture of the 70’s, to the ultimate sacrifice of Jesus Christ. The love I speak about is the unending love, the love that gives expecting nothing in return, the love that costs something, unselfish. This is the type of love that God has for the world, the type of love that I have seen the world in desperation for. What I haven’t realized or taken to heart was that the passionate, unrelenting, undistracted, devastating, and unconditional love that the world is burning for is the same love that God has for me; that He has for you. He is mesmerized by one glance from my eyes; His heart blazes at one trifling word of affection from our hearts to His. I have to know that love, I need to feel it not only for the world, but for myself. Oh, to wake up to the reality of the love of Christ – the destructive love of the relentless Lion and the tender embrace of the Lamb.

The program that I am enrolled in is expensive. It is even more expensive now that we are back in the States. The team of monthly supporters helps a great deal, but as it stands, I have no way of paying for the school fees as well as the bills that I have back home as well. I have this issue of pride with asking for others to come along-side me, joining me in accomplishing the goal and finishing the program, but after praying about what God wanted me to do, I felt that I should use the blog this week to do just that. It is a sacrifice of my pride, the idea that I should be providing for myself, and what I think the blog should be… but, in obedience, I have to.

I started PhotogenX last September and I intend to finish it. These next 6 months we will be working on a publication from our travels and experiences with injustice around the world. We want it to be a catalyst of change in the world. We are willing to be used, but we need help. I need help. My fees for the school are $4,000 just for this next 3 months and at the moment I don’t have it. I am trusting God for this provision believing that He can finish what He started. The waves of financial pressure are building all around me, but He knows exactly where I am and He is with me. If you would like to stand with me, there are many ways to do so; please let me know.

Thanks for reading about my journeys and experiences. I pray that you open yourself up to the Amazing Love and Grace that comes only through a loving relationship with Jesus Christ.

In Obedience to Him,

John Paul

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12
Jul 08

The Essence of Unseen

Sitting in front of an empty screen is consoling; the small blinking cursor in the sea of white reminds me of my current condition and the state of my emotions. After traveling for the last 10 months experiencing a myriad of situations, worldviews, and thought processes, my mind and spirit have been on a proverbial rollercoaster. It was a ride that I thoroughly enjoyed.

Upon arriving back in the US, my expectations were sent soaring. The Not Alone Benefit made some money for the Mercy Development Home in Ethiopia, I saw some friends and family members, and then all of the sudden I was on my way back to Kona to resume studies and work on the publication from our experiences. What I didn’t anticipate was the slight depression that landed on me almost simultaneously with my plane landing in Honolulu. Depression is something that I have struggled with in the past, almost as if whenever I look behind me it is as if a shadow is always a hundred feet behind…sometimes closer, sometimes further, and sometimes I don’t even look.

Over the last few days, I think that I have been able to identify areas in my life that the depression feeds off of. I want to deeply trust God that He is who He says He is. I should know both in my head and my heart that He is good having witnessed His amazing provision and love. There is also this seemingly inherent fear of being hurt alone, as well as some psychological and emotional wounds in need of deep tissue healing. All of that culminating with the financial stresses of going through school with hardly any of the money than is required.

Maybe it has something to do with my struggle to always see God as my Father. In a recent talk to the body of believers out here in Kona, Andy Byrd, an amazing man of God, gave a parallel of his relationship with His son. Asher is about 4 years old and is passionate about his love for his father. He never distrusts Andy’s ability to clothe, feed, and give good gifts to him. Andy is not God, but the reliance that Asher has on his daddy is the way I want to relate with my Heavenly Father. In fact, that is the way that faith is supposed to work. With my eyes fixed on God, the waves around me are insignificant next to the power that He has. And then there is the promise that God’s power, the power that raised Christ from the dead, is living inside of me. Why do I worry? Why do I strive for control over my life when the Perfect Father, the Creator and Sustainer of the universe is alive within me? The reality of Jesus and His life is the reality that I need to be living in, not this façade, this thin, filthy veneer that I see. It about looking beyond, looking to the reality that Christ brought – the Kingdom that He ushers in – the Kingdom that He placed within.

As I have mentioned in some of my posts, I love the thought of Love. The word has lost a lot of meaning in our time and can mean anything from a red glass window in Amsterdam paid for by the hour, to the subculture of the 70’s, to the ultimate sacrifice of Jesus Christ. The love I speak about is the unending love, the love that gives expecting nothing in return, the love that costs something, unselfish. This is the type of love that God has for the world, the type of love that I have seen the world in desperation for. What I haven’t realized or taken to heart was that the passionate, unrelenting, undistracted, devastating, and unconditional love that the world is burning for is the same love that God has for me; that He has for you. He is mesmerized by one glance from my eyes; His heart blazes at one trifling word of affection from our hearts to His. I have to know that love, I need to feel it not only for the world, but for myself. Oh, to wake up to the reality of the love of Christ – the destructive love of the relentless Lion and the tender embrace of the Lamb.


The program that I am enrolled in is expensive. It is even more expensive now that we are back in the States. The team of monthly supporters helps a great deal, but as it stands, I have no way of paying for the school fees as well as the bills that I have back home as well. I have this issue of pride with asking for others to come along-side me, joining me in accomplishing the goal and finishing the program, but after praying about what God wanted me to do, I felt that I should use the blog this week to do just that. It is a sacrifice of my pride, the idea that I should be providing for myself, and what I think the blog should be… but, in obedience, I have to.

I started PhotogenX last September and I intend to finish it. These next 6 months we will be working on a publication from our travels and experiences with injustice around the world. We want it to be a catalyst of change in the world. We are willing to be used, but we need help. I need help. My fees for the school are $4,000 just for this next 3 months and at the moment I don’t have it. I am trusting God for this provision believing that He can finish what He started. The waves of financial pressure are building all around me, but He knows exactly where I am and He is with me. If you would like to stand with me, there are many ways to do so; please let me know.

Thanks for reading about my journeys and experiences. I pray that you open yourself up to the Amazing Love and Grace that comes only through a loving relationship with Jesus Christ.

In Obedience to Him,

John Paul

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1
Jun 08

From the Desert to the Rainforest

I would like to begin with an update from St. Ameria’s in Uganda. John Bills, a close friend of mine was recently teaching and developing ideas with leaders in Uganda. He has been with me for part of the last year and had visited St. Ameria’s. They have never left his heart either so while he was there he made sure to stop by to see how everything was doing. We had both been working to see what we could do to provide them some much needed funding and encouragement for the well being of the children (starting, as you may remember, with the bunk beds to keep the children off of the floor). Even in the short year that has passed since I left Uganda, through the money that many of you have given, St. Ameria’s has been doing some substantial construction and have also ensured other immediate needs of the children like food, clothing, and medicine are being administered. They have almost completed with the boys dormitory, but need some more money to be able to do it. I am amazed at what God has done for those children in Uganda and honored that he would let me be a part of it. If you would like to get involved, even in flying out to Uganda to help in the construction, please let me know and I would be overjoyed to give you more information.




A team from Germany came to Spain to teach us about photography. We didn’t learn heaps about photography that week, but we had major breakthroughs as a family that the students have become. Amsterdam was a difficult time for most of us, not only as a team, but on individual levels as well. We were disconnected, distraught, and visionless. In a way, we had forgotten why God had called us to do this program in the first place and, in our relation with each other, weren’t walking in love. Spain and the team from Germany provided a sort of intervention, keeping us all in the same room sharing what we were struggling with in relation to the team, ourselves, and with God. It was such a fruitful time that reignited our passion to receive and give the Father’s love freely.

[A mountain that Tim and I climbed overlooking Torremolinos]

[The lower part]


We had a week to travel around Southern Spain and North Africa as well, so the next week Aaron, Anna, and I separated from the rest of the group, who took up their own travels, and headed to Morocco. I don’t know if I have been in a more beautiful nation. Morocco has so much from cold temperature to the searing hot deserts; Atlas mountains to Mediterranean and Atlantic Coastlines. We spent the week traveling all over the country and grew to know and appreciate each other more. We shared frustrating moments and as well as those of sheer beauty and delight. We met some amazing people while traveling and at our temporary destinations. Too much happened to record it all, so be sure to check out (and comment on) Anna’s Blog which contains a daily video diary from the trip. (Anna’s Blog) Hopefully the pictures and captions will give an idea about the trip as well, maybe even better than words can in this instance.

[A hillside in Tanger, Morocco]
[Marrakesh is a city known for its craziness. It has one of the biggest markets in North Africa and competes with Addis Ababa for Africa's largest. Even on the first day, I needed to get away from it, so Scott and I headed into the back alleys away from everything else and found a small group of boys playing soccer. We spent a few minutes with them before heading back to the hostel.]

[Morocco is known for a traditional dish called Tajin. You can find it everywhere along with the spices that are included. There is so much color in Morocco, more than I ever expected.]

[Anna and Aaron on the Atlas mountain pass. Our guide, Housine, asked us to count the number of turns on the way up. We didn't, but he kept asking. When we got to the top, he wouldn't tell us how many until we gave him good guesses, but after we did he revealed that there were only 2; right and left. Clever, Housine... very clever.]

[When we were told that we would be driving through the Atlas Mountains to get to the desert, I wasn't expecting red earth, snow covered peaks, and windblown wheat fields filling the valleys. Anna and Aaron both said that it reminded them of Nepal. It just reminded me of something beautiful since I had never seen anything like it (besides maybe the Alberta Canada coat of arms).]

[Housine says that the Berber people only live in the mountains. Its possible that they came from the Mountains, but they live all over Morocco. They make up about 60% of the population if you are interested in figures. They are a warm people, a point that I will explain in another caption.]

[After driving through some diverse and amazing landscapes and biomes, we arrived at the end of the road, literally. Housine lives in a small desert town called M'Hamed and it is where the pavement ends as far as roads go. We stayed on the edge of the Sahara in Bedouin type tents at a campsite. Unlike many other of the tourist programs, it was just Aaron, Anna and I at the camp with Housine and his friends and family.]



[Housine and his family come from the tribal Tauregs that once traversed the Sahara. They are also known as Nomads or the Blue Men because of their bright blue jalebahs (long shirts). Because of the Nation-States that have invaded the African continent in the lat 200 years, whole tribes have been cut off from each other, especially with countries with closed borders like Algeria, a mere 38 kilometers from the town of M'Hamed. The once itinerant Blue Men are mostly settled down now, but the freedom of wandering is evident in the infrastructure of their towns and the remains of vacated Kasbahs (old towns with refuges) that dot the desert countryside. Who knows how long Housine's family will stay in M'Hamed?]

[After visiting the old M'Hamed Kasbah, we headed via Landrover to the Chicaga Dunes. It is one of the largest dune systems in Morocco and boasts the highest dune of 300 meters (or 990 ft). The desert is one of my favorite ecosystems and for some odd reason, I find refreshment for my spirit there.]

[A few tourists taking a rest on one of the lower dunes. We were surprised that there weren't many tourists and the dunes were relatively untouched, which was amazing for pictures.]

[Anna making the long trek to the top of the highest sand-dune. There is this innate desire to see the highest point around and climb it. We gave in to this aspiration and reached the summit with a few minutes of sunrise left.]

[Aaron and Anna at the top. We hauled Anna's MacBook to the top in order to record one of our daily video journals which can be viewed HERE on Anna's Blog. We watched the sun drop beneath the horizon and praised our Maker for His amazing creation. Soon after, we headed back to the camp and fell asleep early (before the Blue Men were finished with their rhythmic songs) so we could get up for sunrise.]

There were no thoughts of sadness, worry, or disappointment as my feet almost flew down the sand dunes in the Saharan section of Morocco. I was carefree (besides feeling that I might end up toppling end over end down the rest of the dune) experiencing excitement, joy and freedom. There are moments like this in all of our lives, some brief others long-lasting, that force us to forget about our issues no matter how big or small. In reflecting on the seemingly insignificant instance, I realized that many people as they get older don’t take the time or even feel like they can have moments they can let themselves go with childish enthusiasm to experience innocent joy and exuberance. Look for your sand dune.

[Our camp at the Chicaga dunes was surprisingly cozy despite the fine layer of dust that covered everything (including our camera equipment). The sun rewarded our early morning efforts with spectacular views of the dunes and the textures of the sand. After breakfast we piled back in the Landrover and started the long journey back to Marrakesh, 12 hours away.]

[Along the way, we stopped in a Berber village high in the Atlas mountains. We had yet to experience hospitality in the way they showed it to us. We were invited to a terrace overlooking wheat fields and mountain dwellings where we enjoyed mint tea and broken conversations. We were invited to spend a few nights up in the village, but wouldn't have had a way to get back to Marrakesh had we done so. We all want to visit Morocco again and spend much more time in the Atlas with the Berbers.]


[It is extremely difficult to get photos of women, especially in the Muslim world. Equally difficult is getting to know them and their stories. Outside of the craziness of the Marrakesh Medina, we wandered in a small community of craftsman and porters. There were no Westerners walking the streets so it was much easier to relate with the people on a personal level. Anna had been praying that she would be able to get connected with a local woman and possibly even get portraits of her. God presented the opportunity and we spent close to an hour and a half getting to know the Berber family who had come to Marrakesh. We were so blown away by their hospitality and warmth. We would all love to go back and visit them someday as well.]

[Morocco is quite famous for its leather. The largest tannery is located in Fez, but there are also quite a few large tanneries in Marrakesh as well. It is popular for tourists to go and thus popular to be led to specific tanneries by a myriad of different people, including children and inebriated men. We finally made our own way through an open door into a tannery deserted by tourists. We walked around and took some pictures before heading back to our hostel. The man on the bottom is Abdallah Azziz who showed me the whole process of tanning leathers, a process that has become his life-long profession.]

[Some of the Arab influenced architecture in Marrakesh]
[The closest coastal town to Marrakesh is Essaouira (I am still terrible at the pronunciation). Translated, the name means "windy city" and it is very windy. It is also dominated by the tourism industry. There is also a history and tradition of catching fish in the Atlantic, so a generous fishing industry also brings in revenue for the coastal community.]

[A man sits at the gate of the Essaouira medina in the traditional dress of many Moroccans, a hooded jalebah.

[One of the strays that Aaron and Anna (and I) fell in love with]

[Another of Essaouira's medina gates.]

[Aaron standing in front of a colorful backdrop composed of rugs and blankets]

[The medina walls of Essaouira]

We are in Costa Rica and Latin America for the next few weeks finalizing the phase of the track in which we travel around the world. It’s hard to believe that it has been almost 9 months already. Pray for us as we finish here, take a quick break at home, and then meet back in Kona. I will be sure to have another blog update before then.

In His Love,

John Paul Vicory

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11
May 08

Dreams, England, and the Mediteranean…

[Brassica napus (aka rapeseed) field near Doncaster, UK]

[Snake Pass in the Pennines]

Leaving Amsterdam was bittersweet, as I had mentioned last time. Upon leaving, I flew to the middle of the United Kingdom to spend a number of days in a town called Doncaster. My uncle has been living there for the last 6 years and it is rare that I get to spend any serious time with him. Before this, I can’t remember having so much fun and such close communion with him. When I look back on this track, it will be one of the highlights. Thanks, Uncle Forest, it was such a blessing to be there with you.

[Nesting swans on Keepmoat lake in Doncaster]


[Young Lambs in a field near Snake Pass in the Pennine Range]

Driving through the winding, slithery roads of South Yorkshire,where Doncaster is located, a flood of memories came back to me. As a Member of Parliament for this area, William Wilberforce spent much of his time in the area. We can be grateful to his obedience to God in ending the slave trade in England, which set the stage for ending legal slavery all over the world. Hudson Taylor, one of the first missionaries to China was from the region as well.

These roads were rich in history, around every turn were familiar signs and names… “That was here?” Even most of the important scientific discoveries ever were made on this land by brilliant (and sometimes not so brilliant) minds. When the Western Church was expanding, Benedictine monks came to its shores and established abbeys that were vital to the reading and translating of the Bible. The Roche Valley Abbey (monastery and cathedral) was erected from 1147 to 1149 and remained an active area of studying/worship for at least 14 monks and many others for 389 years until the King Henry VIII had problems with the Catholic Church in Rome. With the dissolution of all of the monasteries in England the Roche became unoccupied and fell victim to the looting of the treasures and even stones of the buildings. Even the largest Abbey in England, the Fountains Abbey in Ripon Valley was subject to the wrath of Henry VIII. because of his issues with divorce. He broke off from the Catholic Church and formed the Anglican Church, which is still the official church in England.

[Roche Valley Abbey near Doncaster, UK]

[Fountains Abbey near Ripon, UK]

Throughout history, especially in Europe and especially with Christianity, there have been divisions, wars, moral dilemmas, and intellectual supremacy that has kept Europe in much of a Dark Age. Many missionaries ended up coming out of England and Europe, but now in Yorkshire, less than 3% of the population considers themselves Christian? What went wrong? I think that many people used Christianity to fit their own actions instead of conforming to the image of Christ in word and deed. When the Age of Enlightenment came around, they no longer even needed to hide behind the façade of Christianity, but were now accountable to no one, neither man or God.

What happened along the way? Did science give us a reason to deny the existence of a Creator? In the academic course I am enrolled in, we must read an array of books by a myriad of authors. One of the books is called “A Short History of Nearly Everything” by a distinguished author named Bill Bryson. Throughout the book (which is lengthy and a bit difficult), everything points back to the absence of order in the universe, explaining scientific theories and their holes,but doesn’t explain possible reasons for the holes. What is evident throughout the book is that we really know very little, with gaps in conjectured (some solid) theories. However observant Bryson may be, he didn’t even allude to the possibility that there could be a Creator and Sustainer of the universe. I hold to the basic principles of naturalism and evolution, but know that it was God whom spoke it all into existence; He set everything in motion and continues to work in His creation – guiding it along. But for the majority of the scientific community, science gave a reason to question. [Maybe some day, I will dedicate a whole entry to my thoughts on creation, nature, science and evolution; this entry is for other thoughts.] To sum it up,in the minds of many, Nietzsche was right… We killed God. We have lifted ourselves up to a position of thinking that we don’t need God (which we obviously do) nor should we be accountable to Him (which is the basis for all morality).

I know that the I AM lives and I need more of Him… desperately – sometimes I just lose sight of it. The first week in Spain I had a dream; literally. My dreams seem to me as a movie in which i have the starring role. In most of them, I view myself from the outside as if I was watching but then participate emotionally and psychologically with what is happening… a little hard to explain. At the start of the dream, I was in the ‘missions field’ doing work, helping people, and feeling good about myself. The scene after that I was coming in through the front door of home. It wasn’t my physical house in Denver or anything, but it had the feeling that I had arrived at my real home… After placing my small bags down I walked around. There were a few people around, but ultimately I made it back to the dining room. As I walked in, I suddenly had to stop. There in front of me was a big table almost completely empty. At the head of the table was the Father God in physical form. I never saw His face, I just knew that it was Him. I did see his arms and hands, resting on the table on both sides of an empty, untouched plate. He had been waiting for me. I felt as though I made the most important date imaginable, but had forgotten about it because I was too caught up doing my own thing. I was instantly regretful, ashamed, and guilty that I was capable of doing such a thing. Then I woke up.
Throughout the morning, I came back to the dream, knowing that I am fully capable of doing good things for the wrong reasons. I am a selfish person. The dream made me examine my life and question my motives for doing anything at all. Do I live my life away from God, disregarding His willingness to have a relationship with me? Do I count Him out of my activities, unwilling to do what He wants me to do?
The Bible tells me that the driving force of my life should be loving God (Luke 10:27). There is nothing more important than that, and I know if from my own experience as well. There is nothing more fulfilling. Why then is it so easy to forget? I want to be in a position where I can love God above everything else, no matter what or where that puts me (even if it’s in Siberia studying lichen or in Africa working with HIV positive people). Nothing is better than my relationship with Him. He is still there, waiting to commune with me, to fellowship with me, to speak love to me. He has been there all along. One of the most beautiful things in existence is that He wants to have a relationship with all of us on an individual, unique, and intimate level.

Because He loved first
John Paul

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18
Apr 08

Traffic Jams, Fish, and some other things

Driving down I-25 or the “Valley Highway” as my dad likes to call it, I always get caught in traffic. For some reason, the Metro Denver Area thought it would be a great idea to fix the whole highway at once and to take 10-15 years doing it. While stuck in traffic, I usually do one of two things; I get angry or go crazy. And when I get angry I am basically going crazy but it includes shaking the car back and forth, not talking to myself which is the “normal” crazy.

In Amsterdam this week, I found myself stuck in a different traffic jam, but the results were pretty much the same, I became a bit angry and I think I went a bit crazy as well. This traffic jam is quite predictable; it is in the center of the city and lasts from around 9pm to around 3 in the morning. The streets are packed not with honking cars, but with broken men and women. The sex industry in Amsterdam brings in over a US Billion Dollars a year. Most of the girls in the Red Light District remain there as if locked in a prison cell, bars of steal and cells of concrete substituted for a door of glass and a red room with a bed. Many are from different parts of Europe or North Africa and were recruited for hotel jobs. When they got to Amsterdam, the glittery promises fall through, their captors flaunt their passports in front of their face; scared and intimidated, they submit to whatever they are required to do. It becomes an issue of Human Trafficking.

Dutch girls are herded in other ways, with the use of “Lover Boys” who drive into the country in their BMW’s and Mercedes, getting to know girls from 13-17. Soon they know everything about the girls even knowing where they live and befriending their parents. They are whisked away to Amsterdam with their rich boyfriends who also promise them luxurious lives, but when they get here they are hit with reality that things are not what they seem. If they try to get out now, they are reminded of who knows where their parents live and where they can be found. Even the women who enter the “profession” on a temporary basis to pay off debt or similar situations find themselves trapped in a system which is next to impossible to get out.
Not only is it sad to see the women behind their invisible bars, the city is filled with broken people searching for something that is real. They come to smoke blunts, indulge in sexual fantasies, and get lost in both. They come because of a void that is pulling them, but the behavior that they are involved in makes sure that they will never fulfill no matter how lost they get. You see the brokenness in their eyes as they dart from girl to girl, you hear it in their congratulatory (and often times drunken) congratulations to their buddy who just came out of the room to make room for the next one in line. It makes me sad, but it makes me think. I am not so different from them. For a long time I searched as they did for something to fill the emptiness that I couldn’t escape from. I tried to lose myself to forget that I had a void; sometimes even to forget that I was…

The thing is, without Jesus, we all are searching for that something. We all need Him to be okay. He is the only one that satisfies our deepest longings as humanity. We can implement programs and projects all over the world; we can put an end to prostitution, AIDS, and even hunger, but the longing will always remain and will manifest itself as selfishness and greed. I was reading a book recently and found a small paragraph that changed my life forever.
“There is an old adage that says, ‘You can give a man a fish or better still you can teach him to fish.’ Jesus would add, ‘You can teach a person how to fish but even the most successful fisherman has a hunger that fish cannot satisfy.’” – Ravi Zacharias in Jesus Among Other Gods

While Jesus was here, He completely transformed the Earth, no one else is like Him. Unlike the champions of other religions, Jesus was not just showing the way, He is the Way. He didn’t only teach His message, He is His Message. Not only did He proclaim truth, He is Truth. He didn’t just offer the Water of Life; He is the Water of life. We are all made to crave relationship with our Creator, which is the emptiness. Jesus is the Way to a restored relationship with the Father.
We are all weak, yes. Even after a revelation of who Jesus is, we still fall sometimes because we are human and will always take our eyes off of perfection. But in our weakness, He is strong. He is able to pick us up again and extend His Amazing Grace and show us again a glimpse of who He really is.

Not only is He strong in our lives when we are weak, He is strong in other people’s lives when we are weak. I think that we have greatly underestimated the power of our testimony in our relationship with Jesus and our interaction with the world. Our testimony is an example of how God was strong in our lives when we were absolutely weak. His strength moving in our weakness can also move in someone else’s weakness as well. Humans relate to the world around them in similar ways; there is nothing new under the sun. Someone who hears my story or your story can relate to you at basic terms. Even someone across the globe will relate to the basics of your humanity and your need for God.

I hope that this encourages you to share your story, invite people to your house, get to know your neighbors and the people you sit next to week after week in church or class. Maybe God wants to use you to bring change to this world. Maybe it is actually Jesus sitting next to you.

Pray for the Prostitutes; for the Broken; for the Downtrodden and Outcast and the condition of the world that they represent. God sees them and loves them dearly. Pray for yourself as well, that you may have courage to be in the world, but not be of it. That you may show people there is a Spring of everlasting water that gives life to even the most dead. The Light of Life is here and so is His Kingdom.

in Christ, the Way
John Paul

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26
Feb 08

Holy Land, Egypt… then to Ethiopia!

Leaving the Holy Land was a surreal experience. It had been a month, spent almost all in Jerusalem, a haven for tension. A couple trips to Galilee broke up the monotony and opened my eyes to more of what the Holy Land has to offer and a better idea of where and how Jesus lived.

[The Wall of separation from the Bethlehem side]

[Dome of the Rock on the Temple Mount, Jerusalem]

[Palestinian Man in the Old City, Jerusalem]

My head is still wrapped around the whole concept of the Israeli/Palestinian conflict. I don’t think that I will ever understand it; never be able to choose sides. I don’t think that is my job or my place; it belongs to the One who is sovereign of over the affairs of nations. My hope is that all nations go down in flames, not with the physical tongues of fire but with a fire that consumes the monuments of hatred concealed in the hearts of all men. Laid waste by the love of Christ, refined with unquenchable intensity, and transformed into citizens of the Kingdom whose new passion is found in the grace and love that flows from the heart of the King. The wasteland is replaced with streams of light and a garden of life; lush pastureland and abundant fruit trees.

[Looking West from Arbel]

[Area of Tubqa, Sea of Galilee: See John 21]

[Group of Apples in the hallway market outside of our hostel in Jerusalem]

My heart burns for the Holy Land to have this kind of transformation, but I don’t want it to stop there. I want that for Egypt, East Africa, Nepal, Colombia, the United States; any location containing those God made in His own image.


[Laurus (Seagulls) in the Rain, Galilee]

We arrived back in Cairo about a week ago and have been engaged in learning since we landed. I love this city and this country. I have a feeling there may be some more time spent here in the future. We have been learning some more about “Painting with Light” which is the actual definition of photography but also a type of photography which I will give examples of. This week, Luke Moon is back from Kona teaching us about Worldview; he actually leads the Humanities school at the U of N in Kona. He provides some practical and contemporary insight that enables me to think clearly about the world around me and how others think about it as well.

[Pictures that were taken as assignments during the week: Seeing Light, Studio Lighting, Night Photography, and Light Painting]

[Said, one of the doormen/watchmen of our building]

[Minibus driver in Tahrir Square (via sideview mirror)]

[Tahrir Square Mosque]

class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent:0.5in;text-align:center;">[My model and friend, Wally]

[Tahrir Square from the top of our building]

[Experimenting with open shutters, satellite disks, and external flash units... and the moon]

[Light Painting + Night Photography + Waterscape on the Nile]

[Breakfast light painted]

[I just like it]

At the end of the week I, as well as the rest of PhotogenX, will be going to Ethiopia. For those who didn’t receive my blog updates last year, I did my DTS outreach in Ethiopia from January through February of last year. This will be the first time I will be going back and I am so excited. Please pray that distant connections will be renewed and that Ethiopia will be a place for all of us to reconnect with God’s heart for the world. Sometimes it is easy to get tired and worn out with moving to a new place every 3 or 4 weeks. We need renewed vision and a greater revelation of the love of Christ for all nations and all people.

[Pictures from Garbage City, a Coptic Christian area of Cairo, Egypt]

The financial needs on the Track are always present as well. Recently a student has to leave the program because of financial reasons. We all know what it is like to struggle with finances, but it was made very real this week. For my situation, I collected a bit of debt especially during college that has been weighing on me lately. God has always provided for my immediate needs and paying the bills as well, but I long to get out from under the pressure of those payments. I am trying to set up a website to make my pictures available for purchase, but am in need of assistance for that as well. I appreciate your prayers for me and the rest of the team as well. We are becoming very close (as you can imagine from constant time together) and it’s very hard when someone has to leave.

Pray for protection as we travel to and around Ethiopia and that we will do exactly what God wants us to do in Ethiopia and the rest of the time in Egypt. I have all of these ideas for opportunities and would love to see them come to fruition.

Thank you for your time, thoughts, prayers, and communication as well. I would love to hear from you. In response, I will try to get back to you in a timely manner, but with the internet situation, might take a few days.

Because of Jesus

John Paul Vicory

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21
Nov 07

"Mars Hill really Rocked…" Last update from Greece!


[One of the most amazing sunsets ever, Porto Rafti, Greece]

Thank you, Dan Shannon, one of our speakers this week, for that lovely quote. As part of our teaching this week, the entire class and our speakers took a trip to Athens to spend the day around the Acropolis area, including the Areopagus (Mars Hill). A couple of us had spent some time there before, but one of our speakers, David Hamilton, gave some stellar background information on the area and the lifestyle of Athens at that time.

[First Olympic Stadium, Athens, Greece]

It was the center of the world for the arts, education, and contemporary thought. The philosophers could gather around the monumental temples in the center of the city and toss around ideas of democracy, science, and life. We read Acts 17 where Paul walks in to the center of town and makes his voice and the Gospel that it carries known. They called him an idiot and threatened him with his life (Socrates had been put to death for introducing foreign gods). Even in the face of them, he spoke to them with the authority of the Holy Spirit. It was the first time the Gospel had been shared there, and he was all by himself

[Acropolis Panorama at Night, Athens, Greece]

To gaze on these amazing buildings and to have insight into their structure and intricacies, there is no wonder that people worshiped those whom the buildings were built for. At one time in the Parthenon (the largest, most prominent temple to the goddess Athena Parthenon), there was a giant statue made of pure gold, diamonds, pearls and other precious jewels. These people held their gods in such high esteem, but why? In polytheistic cultures, people live in fear of the gods. They fashion their lives around pleasing them and bribing them with elaborate sacrifices and practices. When bad things happen, a god is mad at them so further action needs to be taken. The gods were always trying to do bad to them. As David Hamilton so eloquently put it, “Religion was a minimizing of fear not an establishment of hope.” So Paul waltzes in and challenges them by saying that there is an Unknown God, and that is a God that cares deeply about them; enough to send his Son to them to be the last sacrifice. This was revolutionary for them, a God that cared? A God of Grace?

Now, there are many lessons that I took away from not only from the teaching, but my time walking around the Acropolis.

The first is that the idolatry of the Greek culture was immensely beautiful. These buildings brought out emotion and awe, and who they stood for brought awe as well. They were still false gods, but they were, and still are attractive. Even now, there are so many things that are attractive to us, pulling us, but aren’t things of God. We start to worship materialism and set up mere humans in the places of importance in our lives. That’s just the tip of the iceberg with all of the things we place in the high places of our lives… But, just as with the buildings in the Acropolis, the things of this world will come to ruin. No matter how fast we work, or how much we maintain, they will always be temporal, no matter how great the appear. We can use the illustration for idolatry and sin in our lives; it might look great for a time, but in the end, it all turns to dust.

The philosophers must have looked at Paul like he was crazy; pointing to the vast buildings just beside them as testimony of their god’s greatness. But the God that Paul shared with them on that day in Athens is the same God that is alive and well today, dwelling in the lives of his people. He truly does last forever and it has been proven time and time again throughout the history of the world. When our hearts and lives aren’t built on the foundation of Jesus Christ, they will crumble to dust.

The second lesson was just as valuable. Like I said before, the people lived in constant fear because there was no way to please the multitude of manic, compulsory, selfish, immoral, and illusory gods. Paul submits to them that there is a God who actually cares for them and will extend perfect grace to them, not by a manner of bribery, but acceptance and revelation. So many times, even as Christians, we come with this thought of God like the Greek pagans did… If I do this for you, God, will you be satisfied; can I go to heaven? We have this mental block that he doesn’t really want the best for us; that our plans are more effective than his; that our comfort is of utmost importance. We believe the lies of the enemy that God is angry with us and will never accept us with our imperfections…

Well, I felt like this is what God was telling me earlier this week, even before going to Athens…

Then the angel showed me myself standing before the angel of the Lord. The Accuser, Satan, was there at the angel’s right hand, making accusations against me. And the Lord said to Satan, “I, the Lord, reject your accusations, Satan. Yes, the Lord, who has chosen him, rebukes you. This man is like a burning stick that has been snatched from the fire.”

My clothing was filthy as I stood there before the angel. So the angel said to the others standing there, “Take off his filthy clothes.” And turning to me said, “See, I have taken your sins, and now I am giving you these fine new clothes.” [Zechariah 3:1-4]

God is not far off, distant, and angry. He desires to take us as we stand before Him, filthy and unrefined. He cannot wait to extend his grace to us, but it does cost us something. We have to tear down the idols that we have and embrace him as the only Lord of our lives.

Last year around this time in my DTS lecture phase, I finally was able to co
me to this point. I realized that I had built my life on idols and didn’t know God. Those idols came crashing down and I found myself standing before God, afraid, but as my only hope. My clothes were black with sin, charred and filled with the smell of smoke. Satan stood there bringing accusations of all kinds which I had believed for so long. The Creator of the universe silenced him by extending his grace to me and I found myself renewed and clean; now standing before my Father.

If this is similar to your story, I would love to talk about it further. Like I said and my life testifies, God wants us to be in communion with him as His children. And, I want to challenge you all to examine your own lives and see if there are things that, although they may seem beautiful, you have built to unworthy places in you life. We can see from the story of the Greek gods, that they won’t stand a chance.

[Pillars in the Agora (Ancient Marketplace), Athens]

That’s it for now, until Turkey, may the Lord bless you and keep you

In Him

John Paul


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